That's Disgusting!
Some behaviors at the dinner table shouldn't just be classified as not having manners -- they are just in poor taste! The problem is that many of these actions are also big attention grabbers, so be careful as you discipline. Correct the behavior, particularly if it's one he's exhibited before, but be aware your child may just be looking for a reaction from you.
Is there anything funnier to a preschooler than a burp? Probably not. Remind your child to close his mouth before he burps and to be sure to say "excuse me" afterward. One of the causes of a burp could be is that your child is eating too fast. Make sure her food is cut up in small pieces. At around age 5, your child is ready to use a butter knife. Teach her the proper way to hold it.
Teaching your child to use a fork and knife correctly may also prevent them from playing with their food, a popular mealtime stalling technique. Whatever she is doing -- blowing bubbles in her milk, launching peas at her baby sister -- remove the item in question and tell her if she keeps it up she will no longer be able to sit at the table like a big girl.
Another parent non-favorite is when kids chew with their mouth open. This is a little harder to correct because it's a learned behavior. If after a few reminders you can still see what your child is eating, try bringing a pocket mirror to the table and showing your child what he is doing and how yucky it looks. If your child talks with his mouth food, a simple reminder to "Chew and swallow first, then talk," should do the trick.
Some children spit their food out, especially if it is something they do not like. This is a big no-no. Tell your child once he puts something in his mouth he is to chew and swallow it completely.
What Did You Say?
Proper manners isn't just about saying "please" and "thank you" (although they are a big part of it), it's also about teaching your kids what not to say. Children this age don't have the ability to filter what is appropriate to say and what isn't, so chances are if they don't like what has been put in front of them to eat, they will be vocal about it. Luckily, the ability to think first and speak later will come with age and practice. Teach her the adage, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." Explain that when she says something mean about the food or makes a rude face, it can hurt the feelings of the person who did the cooking. Instead, teach them to praise what they did like about the meal.
Family dinnertime is a great opportunity to gather everyone together at the end of the day and share exciting events and news. Your preschooler will be excited to take part in this daily ritual and no doubt bring something interesting to the conversation. It's important however, that he learns to wait his turn to speak. This can be a very difficult concept for children this age to understand, so it may take some time. Say, "I need you to wait one minute while sister finishes her story. Then it will be your turn." The one exception to this rule is if she needs to go to the bathroom.
The most important rules of teaching your little one manners is that it's OK if he makes mistakes. Learning and showing manners is something he'll do over the course of his lifetime, so as long as you teach him the basic skills and work to improve on them, he'll be confident in social situations as he gets older. Maybe one day he'll even thank you!
